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My Perfect strangerMy Perfect stranger.
I've met him years ago, nonetheless he barely saw me but few times.
Not the "romantic" type of guys which might send girls flowers for absolutely no reason; He was strongly against it simply hated to spoil them.
Used to make fun of those who does; saying: "I'm no flower boy "
We've always had our little small chats, and a platonic relationship went on for a while, a weird one at least.
Even in his love cruelty appeared...
Days led to months and his memory disappeared with the tide.
Shutting the door slowly on him.
He hated more than he loved; of words he barely used to say, yet they were knifes cutting deep in my throat, every time we spoke.
At a night which I was staying up late finishing some works and papers and searches, he came across my mind, moments later there he was
Did I decide to wait till he shows? Or did he?
Does it actually matters?
What's more important is the following up script our talk produced.
The "tête-à-tête" which wa
The Perfect ImperfectionLets speak the truth...what we had was never perfect
We would always fight..yet the seconds of bliss would make it seem worth it
And I know I made you sad..I kept driving you mad
But think back to what we had.........was it really too bad
Yes we would fight..we'd break up every night
But every morning we'd make up..and again things would start to feel right
Things started to get rough...they were becoming too tough
Then one day you decided that you'd finally had enough
But no matter how much you hate it..I'll always be your first
You had such a lustful heart..and only I could quench its Thirst
So go ahead and hate me..and say that you don't love me
But every time you see the word "love" you will always think of me
And this is what we were...just a perfect imperfection
Hate it all you want..but you just can't go denying our connection
And this love's become rejected..and our hearts become neglected
But babe..no matter what we do...we'll never be completely disconnected
My last angelI'll confess...I'm not Strong
I breakdown every time I hear our song.
And I know that I was wrong
I couldn't prove to them that we Belong
That I fucked up...I'm a Mess
There's no words that could help me express
That this heart's filled with distress
But what can I do..If I no longer have you
Even if I beg to your god..the past isn't something that I can Undo
And I wish, from the start...that I knew
That I was a sky....that was loosing its blue
Who would have known that I'd be so empty.
that there was so many things that could easily tempt me
think back to what was wrong with us..I'm sure you'll think of Plenty
I don't believe in god...but I know you're the last angel that he'll send me
if you still want megive me a reason to stay, but only if you want me
dont let me think im wasting my time, unless i really am
am i something worth fighting for?
someone worth holding on to?
if you thought about us
the two of us together
what comes to mind?
why are you with me?
do you have a good reason?
be honest with yourself first, then honest with me later
you can only love someone for so long
without being loved back
but if you want them to stay
they surely would, even without reciprocation
you cant be completely selfless
sometimes you need to hold tight
letting go so easily implies disinterest
and maybe thats what it is...
i know thats how i'll take it anyways
if you want me, make it clear and why
if you dont want me...
let me go
or let me know
so i can be the one to cut you loose
its better that way
....somehow its better
maybe one day i'll understand this need i have
until then, you should think
and decide your own answer
All for youFalling asleep with tears in my eyes
And haunted by the thoughts of you
This is for you hun'
Your face is smiling at me
A fake, ghost-version of your old beautiful smile
Teasing me with what could have been
What I could have had
Those bright blue eyes look at me
But the sparkle is gone
Now they're just the eyes of a stranger
I watched you dissappear
I stood by and saw you fade away
Only a ghost is left of the old you
There was nothing I could do
So this is for you my dear
I'm holding you oh so tight
Fighting to bring you back to life
I'm falling asleep with tears in my eyes
These teardrops fall for you
This is all for you my love
All I wanted was you.I miss you
(I scratched my wrists until I couldn't think of you anymore,
but it never hurt as much
as losing you.)
I knew I was nothing to you,
but you were still such a huge piece of me.
You took my heart with you when you left,
now it's like you're playing God
to a world that doesn't exist.
Hold me close again,
I swear that I'm not hurting,
(being in denial has never hurt this much.)
(I miss you.)
My every morningI wake up and I'm struggling to breathe
And I scream out "don't leave"
Like if you were still standing by me
But I'm just half asleep
And the scene in my head is too painful to see
The day that you left me to be
Just a hollow version of me
And I look at my hands..that still feel the warmth of your skin
And all of this pain starts to burst from within
Its been a few weeks and I wonder how you have been
Then my head starts to violently spin
Always promise not to think of you..yet always give in
Its quite a predicament...this situation we're in
I'll keep trying to hold out..but needing you doesn't allow me to win
So I blink
and the tears start to rain down as black ink
and these thoughts..with the page starts to link
For one moment..all the pain..to this pen starts to sync
And this page..express in rhyme..every emotion that painfully slinks
Because you know that since you left you're in every thought that I think
Without you I'm meeting extinction..feels like I'm already at the Brink
i'm tired so let me be brokenshe's crying in the corner again
headphones blasting angry lyrics
to drown out everyone else around her
memories are flooding back
things hardly anyone understands
depression is such a monster
it clings to her like a leech
she's scared she'll never be rid of it
but she keeps up the fake smiles and laughter
because the facade is so much easier
she's watched so many she loves
be dropped into the ground
like the petals you pull off daisies
asking if he/she loves you or not
(how often has that answer been not?)
verbal scars still cling to her ears
and remain fresh in her mind
'go kill yourself!' 'you're worthless!'
taunting her day after day
no matter how hard she tries to bury them
she knows a lot of people have it much worse
some of them she talks to everyday
she hasn't been raped, beaten, starving
or suffered through any kind of disaster
but her pain is still there
but it's okay
her life is just dandy
(if you ask anyone else)
Victim of Love I guess we knew this would happen,
somewhere deep down inside,
things I wish I'd never told you,
all the thoughts I had to hide.
It might have been inevitable,
something faded in your heart,
I never thought to fill the silence,
and we're drifting apart.
Another starry-eyed romantic,
forever lost in the the lonesome night,
the moon sings of her returning,
I won't go down without a fight.
I could tell you that I miss you,
Can You Heal My HeartPlease don't leave me alone
But don't stand by too close
I'm scared of the silence
I'm being haunted by ghosts
The past lives in my head
Displaying where my problems arose
Walking down the same road as my father
Is what I'm scared of the most
Never had someone to guide me
Someone who'd show me the path
The only lessons I've had
Showed me to be controlled by my wrath
Little by little
Its been eating at my heart
But who needs to feel
When I'm only embraced by the dark
I need to rub alcohol on all my wounds
So I'll press this bottle to my lips
Every shot is medication
That helps my thoughts become eclipsed
I'll use my pills
To turn my brain a dark abyss
Maybe all I need as medication
Is for Death to come and drop a kiss
Can you fight off these demons
Can you heal my heart
Prove my life is still worth living
Before I fall apart
I don't have much time
Please save me from the dark
To anyone who hears me
Please come and heal my Heart
I'm scared of this life
I'm scared of the pain
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Lilyas has dedicated herself to making our community a brighter place with her vibrant artwork and infectious enthusiasm for interacting with others in our community. It has certainly paid off, as many deviants flock to her page on a daily basis to let her know how much of an inspiration she is. We absolutely agree, and couldn't let all that hard work go without recognition, so it's with great pride that we bestow the Deviousness Award for March 2014, to ... Read More